A collection of poems and other writings...

Wednesday, 29 July 2015

Friday Fairy Cakes

I lift my
the cloth of my
shirt
my T-shirt
my drenched T-shirt

*

three o’clock
three
Friday
and she
triangulates the kitchen
with busy-ness
waiting for the homecoming of us
on the four o’clock bus
pondering tea
and so she
anticipating hunger
reaches into the centre
cupboard
for the large gripstand bowl
and fetches
fat and eggs
from the Lec
in the scullery
stands them next
to the range to warm
washes her hands at the kitchen sink
by the window
glancing up the garden
to the point she knows
in an hour we will become
visible

to see beneath my
under my right ribs
a gaping hole in
wrenched in
the flesh of me
where

*

they
therefore
they
because it was
the preparation day
that the bodies
should not remain
upon the cross
on the Sabbath day
besought him that
their legs might be broken
and that they
might be taken
away
so came the soldiers
to brake the legs of the first
and of the other
which was crucified with him
but when they came to Jesus
and saw that he was dead 
already
they brake not his legs
but one of the soldiers
with a lance
pierced his side
and forthwith
came there out
blood
and water

where the guts
the guts have been
and the heart
the heart has been
they have been
damaged

*

four ounces
four
each of caster sugar
and soft unsalted butter
creamed together
with an ancient wooden spoon
then eggs, two,
free range
beaten and added
by drop
by drop
with a teaspoonful of essence -
Madagascan Vanilla -
followed by flour
another four ounces
self-raising, sifted and weighed
folded
into the glossy mixture
and then the batter
dolloped
by spoon
by soft spoonful
on top of a finger of scarlet jam
in the bases
of paper cases
stood
in the tarnished indents
of a well-used muffin tray
then posted
into the oven
preheated to
three hundred and seventy five degrees
Fahrenheit
until domes of golden cake
glisten proudly above tulips of paper
ready to be
lifted gingerly
and lined up uniformly
on the waiting
mesh cooling-rack

through loss
through injury
injuries
and through loss

*

it was the consultant haematologist
who
in maybe some clumsy attempt to
comfort her
had pointed out
that as she
had older children they
would after her death be
able to attend to
the infant
with whom she
was now
pregnant

and the triangular
the triangular blade
the wound made by
the triangular
bayonet blade
is such
that the sides
the sides of the cut flesh
cannot be

drawn
together
 to staunch
the flow

* 
six o’clock
six
and at tea
there are ham sandwiches
and soft-boiled eggs we pass over
before we
can peel the papers
from the waiting fairy cakes
to reveal the terrifying
broken heart of jam
that has burst into the sponge
to leave a chasm of syrupy sweetness
blood red and oozing
while she pours tea
while she still can
from the aluminium teapot
its dull tannin-stained
surfaces scoured
to a shine
in the last few moments
transfigured
before we arrived
home

and the
wound
the wound thus fails to
it bleeds
it still bleeds
and thus
fails to
it fails to
 heal


to heal

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